photo by Sarah S.
Wednesday, March 13, 2024
A very different experience
photo by Sarah S.
Saturday, February 3, 2024
More peaceful, more loving
(video and transcript)
Related info: Better Choice
photo by Cátia Maciel
Saturday, January 27, 2024
Connections coming and going
Football has been a big connector lately. Hayden loves claw machines and on our trip won (bought) a KC Chiefs window hangie thingamabobber. He thought we should send it to the "unschoolers who sing the Kansas City Song" (Ken & Amy Briggs). When we were at Burger King the other day, the kids' prizes were NFL related. He first found KC Chiefs and reiterated his connection to the team, which led to a talk of the Briggs' actually living in NY -- "NY has TWO teams!!" As he browsed the other teams, he happened upon Cleveland Browns -- "Oh! Now I get the joke on Family Guy!! Cleveland's last name is Brown, I thought it was because of his skin color, well it is! Both!" I didn't realize how many football jokes have been on that series, but Hayden knew of a few others and it is just now that they're connecting and beginning to make sense.
I never knew how multi-layered most movies and television shows are, until I lived the freedom of no censorship with my kids. I'm excited to watch Shrek again with Hayden... we've not seen it in over a year and I know his sense of humor has drastically changed, he's more aware of innuendo, it will most likely be a whole new movie for him. I will miss his *younger* perspective as much as I look forward to this *older* one.
also consider SandraDodd.com/again, about watching things again
Hayden playing in a fountain,
photo by Gail Higgins, I think,
or maybe by Diana Jenner
Saturday, December 30, 2023
Open up and out
Openness to experience is what it's called—interest and curiosity. Being willing to explore, to try new things, to open upwards and outwards.
photo by Roya Dedeaux
Thursday, December 28, 2023
They are whole people
photo by Cátia Maciel
more context, Always Learning, January 2012
Sunday, October 8, 2023
Smile and wait
My recommendation to worried parents is to smile and wait and hold your child lovingly and to do no damage to his happiness while you're waiting for the day he can really read.
SandraDodd.com/r/real
photo by Stacie Mahoe
Friday, October 6, 2023
Happy connectedness
It is clear to me now that happiness—or the lack of it—is a deliberate practice—a cumulative impact from dozens of daily choices over days, weeks, months and years. I didn't mean to become unhappy, so disconnected from my deeper wants and needs. I just believed the many, many voices in my head about how I "should" behave until I couldn't hear my most authentic self anymore.
Seeking joy is my mantra now and joy for all human beings includes feeling deeply connected to other humans and feeling creative and self-actualized, so plenty of so-called work for others gets done, but in a spirit of happy connectedness, instead of burdensome obligation.
SandraDodd.com/joy2
photo by Julie D
Wednesday, September 27, 2023
Responsibility
For purposes of helping people see how unschooling can work, advice that seems (though perhaps it wasn't intended) to say that moms shouldn't worry or feel responsible seems headed the wrong direction.
photo by Roya Dedeaux
Monday, August 28, 2023
Choosing joy
I saw choosing joy was SO much better....really...unschooling and life just flowed....the relationships piece of an unschooling lifestyle was so much more full and sweet. My mind was calmer. It helped me deal better with those niggling fears that popped up about unschooling when I chose to be in THIS MOMENT....seeing the joy and the fun of the moment settled me instead of me stewing for days about if my kids were learning or what about this, or that.
photo by Sarah S.
Tuesday, August 22, 2023
"Life is more fun now."
I love these moments. The other night I was making dinner, and dd (5) says "While you're up, could you get me my gummy worms?" The old me probably would have barked something about how I was in the middle of making dinner. But I said "Okay" in a pleasant way. She says "Mom, what's right and what's left?" So I look around the corner at her and say "Your left hand is holding the remote, your right is holding your head." ds: "Okay, they're on the left side of my cupboard."
It seems like such a little thing, but I was so happy that I had given her the space to figure out something that she was interested in, instead of shutting her down with my crankiness. Change does feel good, and I love all these lovely, simple moments we have now. I love that life is more fun now.
photo by Cátia Maciel
Wednesday, August 16, 2023
Without effort, without knowing
When learning is recognized in the fabric of life and encouraged, when families make their decisions based on what leads to more interesting and educational ends, children learn without effort, often without even knowing it, and parents learn along with them.
photo by Sandra Dodd
Sunday, August 6, 2023
Enthusiasm and clarity
photo by Shan Burton
Saturday, July 29, 2023
When choices come easily
SandraDodd.com/control
photo by Roya Dedeaux
Wednesday, July 26, 2023
Look at your child
at 1:37:10 in the July 20 "Self Directed" podcast:
(click here; option of podcast or video)
photo by Karen James
Tuesday, July 18, 2023
Facilitation
What a child notices on her own, or discovers, or figures out, will connect to other things in her that the parent wouldn't have predicted, or known about. That's good!
Connections are personal, and each web of knowledge is of and within that person.
To make it easier for a child to learn—to facilitate her learning—the parent can provide opportunities, materials, tools, and time. Answer questions. Maybe make suggestions, or play with the child, but don't take over, if you can manage to hang back.
You can learn about learning by watching your child learn.
photo by Roya Dedeaux
Saturday, July 15, 2023
Exploration
Be near your kids, let them explore, be ready to help. Remember to breathe!
photo by Tara Joe Farrell
Saturday, July 8, 2023
Control, more or less
(original)
photo by Roya Dedeaux
Friday, July 7, 2023
Being a child's friend
There is nothing wrong with wanting to be your child's friend. Do what it takes to earn their friendship—be supportive and kind and honest and trustworthy and caring and generous and loyal and fun and interesting and interested in them and all the other things that good friends are to each other. Be the best 40 year old friend you can be (or whatever age you are).
People use "I'm the parent, not a friend," as an excuse to be mean, selfish, and lazy. Instead, be the adult in the friendship. Be mature. You've BEEN a five-year-old and your child has not been a forty-year-old, so you have an advantage in terms of long-term and wider perspective. Use that advantage to be an even better friend. You know how to be kinder and less self-centered and you know how beneficial it is to put forth the effort.
photo by Sandra Dodd, of six-year-old Adam and his mother and friend, Julie
Saturday, June 24, 2023
Being fun
Play with your children, and gently.
Play with your friends, and kindly.
Be glad when things are fun. Help them be so.
SandraDodd.com/playing
From the "Being" section of The Big Book of Unschooling
(page 202, or 235, depending)
photo by Cátia Maciel
Tuesday, June 20, 2023
Unschooling style
People learn different ways, but it's rare (and unnatural) for a person to only learn one way. So the thing to do is to present material and experiences that cover all the ways to learn. Some will do a child more good than others. One child might learn one thing very visually, and another thing tactilely. So instead of wasting ANY time trying to find out how they learn, spend good time learning (yourself) how children learn naturally with all their senses, with all their ways of thinking, or with their own best favorites from moment to moment.
photo by Cátia Maciel